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05-May-2017 23:20

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In my research with gay men, I've found that many wait for their lives to start until the right guy comes along, think that a relationship will somehow fix what they dislike about their lives, and/or assume that a relationship will be the key to status and self esteem. Feeling bad about not having a successful relationship is baggage that you don't want to carry into a new romance.

I can understand why you'd feel scared or insecure, but letting those fears take over is giving in to pessimism.

She would always show up about 10 to 15 minutes late…

eh, no problem; you’re pretty and fun to be around, so I don’t need to see the beginning of the movie. You’re cool, so I will cook some more food,” Myer says, recalling the ways he justified her behavior to himself.

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There were a few little annoying quirks she had, but everything was so much fun when we were together that I was able to look past it.But everything else about the person was awesome, so I tried to look past it.As I experience it more and more, it becomes like nails on the chalkboard to me.The truth is that security comes from within and no boyfriend can give you the refuge you crave in a relationship if you don't feel secure about yourself.

But now that a couple of months have passed, you’re realizing that it’s time to make a decision to either move forward by trying to overlook the irritations and bridge the gaps — or cut your losses and move on.You asked me three questions, so let me advise you by addressing each of them: Not necessarily.If your instincts tell you he's losing interest, that's a definite possibility. If you want to spend more time together, meet each other's friends, or clarify your status (monogamous or dating around), initiate those talks, but in an easy-going, non-accusatory way.“At the two-month mark when my interest starts to fade, I usually start to pull away first,” Myer says.