Rules for dating my gaughter


07-Feb-2017 10:48

Rule Three: I am aware that it is considered fashionable for boys of your age to wear their trousers so loosely that they appear to be falling off their hips.Please don’t take this as an insult, but you and all of your friends are complete idiots.Rule Four: I’m sure you’ve been told that in today’s world, sex without utilizing a “barrier method” of some kind can kill you.Let me elaborate: When it comes to sex, I am the barrier, and I will kill you.The young man’s mother did a very good job teaching manners and etiquette to her son.He ate with us at Easter and even brought flowers and a dessert. That said, this is still my daughter we’re talking about and I’m not naïve. No father likes to see his daughter cuddled with a boy.

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If you cannot keep your eyes or hands off of my daughter’s body, I will remove them.We’ve raised them to seek their identity in the things that matter and not in the superficial, so they are somewhat intimidating to young men. But sooner or later a boy of equal substance was going to show up, and now he has. They both have busy schedules, but if they aren’t learning or working, they are in our home.They love to cook together in our kitchen and try out new recipes.For teenagers, perspective isn’t the easy thing to begin with. This is a dangerous age where everything we do is put under a microscope.

When they are dating, it can get distorted in a hurry. Places where the ambient temperature is warm enough to induce my daughter to wear shorts, tank tops, midriff T-shirts, or anything other than overalls, a sweater, and a goose down parka – zipped up to her throat. But on issues relating to my daughter, I am the all-knowing, all-seeing, merciless god of your universe. It takes very little for me to mistake the sound of your car in the driveway for a helo coming in over a Wadi near Baghdad.Movies with a strong romantic or sexual theme are to be avoided; movies which features chain saws are okay. If I ask you where you are going and with whom, you have one chance to tell me the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. When my Gulf War Syndrome starts acting up, the voices in my head frequently tell me to clean the guns as I wait for you to bring my daughter home.I have a shotgun, a shovel, and five acres behind the house. As soon as you pull into the driveway you should exit your car with both hands in plain sight.



Rules for Dating my Daughter. Rule One If you pull into my driveway and honk you'd better be delivering a package, because you're sure not picking anything up.… continue reading »


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Jeff La Grua, a former U. S. Marine, gathered these rules together from around the Web, updated them a bit and sent them to me. I like these rules very much.… continue reading »


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